Quite frankly, many men [and a lesser number of women] either indulge in it, or dream of doing so, but it is to the undying credit of PMLN to have given to copulation, such a quaint name. By switching the meaning of a single term this political party, so dedicated to the welfare of the poor, has made acceptable what one had to be stoned for if caught in the act, and thus restored some relief and jollity to the land of the pure, where glum faces now have something to smile about. It was in the fitness of things that the party which created Pakistan should have been responsible for this restoration.

It is sad indeed that the leader of this party, who should have been here to receive the plaudits for this, is currently on the run, on secondment to the British Isles after having stolen a fat chunk of money from the people he had sworn to serve. But it was good that at least his comely daughter was present for public adulation to be showered upon her, though the main actor was the lowly Tallal Chowdhary, the erstwhile performer who was better known for regaling the party high and mighty by dancing in front of their political cavalcades.

In meditative moments Nawaz Sharif must be ruing the spurning of his plaintive entreaties by the flint hearted Kim Baker to get within amorous distance of her. Had she not done so, and had his designs on “Tanzim-Saazi” with her borne fruit, he may justifiably have laid claim to be the architect of this restoration himself!

And it must hurt him to think that even his accountant Ishaq Dar, whom Shahid Khaqan Abassi [another Prime Minister] helped abscond, was a greater success at Tanzeem-Saazi than he. During his breaks from robbing the exchequer, Dar the scoundrel was apparently involved in full time Tanzeem-Saazi, not with one but two “workers”–a substantial one and a petit one. It was the petit one though who achieved fame disproportionate to her size, as also the size of the severance package. Because she spilled more beans, Ishaq Dar diverted to her more funds stolen from us than he did towards the fat one. Unequal distribution of resources has been the bane of man through history!

And who can forget Judge Arshad Malik with his Oscar winning performance which the redoubtable Maryam Safdar decided to honour in a press conference attended by the entire panoply of senior PML leadership. Such delicacy! Such taste!

But the ultimate laurel in this sordid drama had to go to the irrepressible Tallah Choudhry. All those who had seen his performances on the media, knew that he was made for greater things.

And he did not fail to disappoint. Cometh the hour [ 3 a.m.], came the man! But at the early morning tryst, instead of being met by his lady love, he walked into the waiting arms of her brothers and their guards. In the ensuing fracas he lost a limb and a rib, but in the process, he immortalized himself. It is he who ultimately gave a heroic new meaning both to Tanzeem-Saazi and to the scurrilous side of romance. And in the process, he redefined leadership. Up to now most of us thought they were just thieves!